tired

im so tired of this.

im so tired of self pity.

im so tired of feeling unwanted.

im so tired of wanting you.

im so tired of loosing.

im so tired of lies.

im so tired of having no friends.

im so tired of missing out.

im so tired of breathing.

im so tired of myself.

im so tired of crying.

im so tired of stinging.

im so tired of having my heart broken.

Still alone

from lipstick thats rose,

to perfectly painted toes.

from celary sticks,

to reading about sucking dicks.

from black tinted lashes,

to rather being ashes.

from running the streets,

to never eating treats.

i try, but im still alone

let me be.

i cant stop. im obsessed. 

every thing about you, no matter how much i try to erase you from my memory.

your still there. your so prominent in my life, i wouldn't know what do to do without you. 

i keep running back, time and time again. 

and when im not with you, i think of you, i write about you, i dream about you. 

i sometimes wish i had never met you. but what i really wish, is that i had never hated you.

that you had never hated me. 

that we had always wanted to each other.